So you’ve squandered your paychecks on vodka gimlets and too many shoes, and now you’re stuck with the shame of having to spend your cherished two weeks of vacay staring at reruns of Full House
. If only you had the means of superstars like Rihanna, who can jet off to tropical climes whenever the mood strikes. But let’s face it, those A&R guys haven’t exactly been knocking down your door. Your only hope? Fake it ‘till you make it.JUST CALM DOWN SPA
The Lomi Lomi Hawaiian Luau Massage at NYC’s Just Calm Down spa uses rolling hula motions to adjust the body’s energy flow and improve your mental, emotional, and spiritual state-of-being. And masseuse Kawai’s intuitive touch is as relaxing as a trip to the Islands—without the twelve-hundred-dollar ticket.
$175 for 60 minutes, justcalmdownspa.com H. MALOHA HAWAIIAN BIONUTRIENT FACE SERUM
Natural Hawaiian red algae, healing kukui nut oil, and 20-odd tropical plants, fruits, and vitamins promise to give skin the celebrated glow of the Hawaiians, who, despite spending their lives baking in the tropical sun, look better than most of us who pass our days blanching under florescent bulbs.
$85, hmaloha.comALORA AMBIANCE CANDLE IN BELLA
Light Alora’s calming lemon, ylang ylang, and ginger scented candle, close your eyes and huddle in close over the flame. You’ll (almost) swear you’re stranded on a Fijian isle.
$40, aloraambiance.comBENEFIT’S HOOLA BRONZER AND DIOR BRONZE GELEE DE MONOI
Brush Benefit’s Hoola bronzer over cheeks and smooth on Dior’s Bronzing Oil everywhere else. Then just tell a few outrageous lies about white sands and shocking flings. No one will ever be the wiser.
, $32, saksfifthavenue.comTROPICAL VIAL BY STRANGE INVISIBLE PERFUMES
Strange Invisible Perfumes' just-launched Tropical Vial eau de parfum is the antithesis of beachy. The lush mango, jasmine, and basil scent evokes dark seas lapping under a Tahitian moon.
$135, siperfumes.comNARS MONOI BODY GLOW II
Nars reproduces the famed Polynesian beauty oil right down to the traditional tiare flower preserved at the bottom of the bottle.
$59, narscosmetics.comCOLLECTION ESSENTIELLE DE CHANEL IN SOLEIL LUMIERE
Chanel’s lip, cheek, and eye palette suggests a tropical landscape, even if you’re stranded in Jersey.